I just joined. I believe I was born depressed. I think it is heraitary. I remember stories of my grandmother dying in state asylum when I was a child. when I was 12 years old my mother shot herself in the head, and died (oviously). My brother also suffers from depression as well as my 3 grown children, though they have not been diagnosed as of yet.I have been on some type of sych med since 1973. I am curently on : trazodone,ativan,gabapentin (nurontin) and a handful of blood preasure drugs. I'm 52, life has been a long series of disapointments and tragidies with diming moments of hapiness I can count on 1 hand. I live alone. I love my children, but I think they are ashamed of me. I am tired but I don't want my kids to go through what I went through by my mothers suicide. So...I live on for thier sake. My only real complaint is the lonelyness. I think it is killing me. :)
