sitting by the pool in the evening in Rome sounds relaxing,I have a hard time leaving my home town,always worryed I'll be late,for what I don't know?Im not good at giving advice. so I wont try! just thought you'ed like to here from somone diffrent .Do you get to talk to your freinds and boy freind over the phone? or internet?
Im sure they think about you often, Talk to again I hope.
Going for a walk is a good idea only that I live alone in Rome and in the evening I can't get out all by myself. And usually this happens to me in the late evening. In fact I was so angry with her because it was late and I ended staying at home all the evening. I'm only studying here so all my friends and my boyfriend too are far away.
The only thing that I can do in the evening during the week is to go to the pool. But in the we I'm often alone.
As for the diary in the past I kept one. Now sometimes I feel the need to write but not very often.
I know where you're coming from on that note also. I hide my true feelings also & who gets hurt by it? You and me! You had every right to ask your friend why. Then you'd have a reason to be frustrated or not, your call on your feelings. I'm trying to avoid the food when I'm like that, gained too much weight not to.
As far as always being there when she calls - set boundaries, do not drop everything and run, especially if she expects you to. This is use and abuse, friendships are built on MUTUAL respect. Make sure you're being respected in your relationships, you'll feel much better and be able to handle these things without as much frustration. I have problems with this also, I feel like I'm drained from giving too much and not getting much in return. I'm trying to change that behavior also.
Let me know how you're doing. As I said I have the same thing and am really trying to set my boundaries. I learn much from others. I hope some of this helps your perspective. Try the sessions on the site, they've been eye opening.
I was disappointed that she couldn't or wouldn't came. When she needs me I'm always there... and when i needed to get out in the evening nothing (we had established before to get out). I don't consider her my best friend but anyway is in the positive scale of friends.
I'm not hiding from my feelings and usually end eating by frustration or if I don't tell the others what is bothering me. Especially in the situation in witch I would have to tell them some things or even fight with them but I try to be polite and non aggressive at all...
I understand how you must have felt. I have that tendancy also only I find myself eating things much worse than cheese and yogurt. What I know about myself is that my binges are actually me hiding from my feelings about the issue, it hurts so I find comfort in food instead of meeting the issue head on. Now when I feel like that I ask myself if I am really hungry or if I'm comfort seeking. If I'm really hungry I eat, but limit the amount, chew slowly and don't take seconds. This works most of the time.
Another thing to try is asking yourself why you are so bothered by this incident. Likely you feel rejected by your friend because she couldn't come to see you. Do you know the reason why? Was it something reasonable that you would have needed to the the same if the roles were reversed? If this is a true friend and you were counting on time together she is probably just as upset that she couldn't make it.
If reasoning isn't working a hobby that you can work on anytime is a good substitute for food.
Small things that make me overreact and finally binge... for example yesterday I should meet a friend but she couldn't came. I felt left alone, i got angry on her with no real motivation. And then I ended binging on cheese and youghurt..... nearly 200g of cheese and two small fruit youghurt... last evening. Now i feel a little seek. But i deserve it.
