Im off to emerg soon cuz of my ringing ear. Its getting so intense it is beginning to hurt. This has nothing to do with loud noise causing hearing damage - this started when I was on a med last summer. Im so frustrated.
Im on a new med, its not working yet, I cant see doc till next week, I'm not sleeping properly, I get all "jittery" when I try to work, I'm at wits end.
I'm so scared. I just about "lost" it today. And yes I am seeing a therapist, but nothing seems to be working. It feels as if I'm running out of time, I dont know what to do, where to turn. I cant seem to get my act together to work. My left ear is ringing so loud right now and docs have no idea why. Right now it feels as if I'm about to explode!
I just found your thread here today, and I just wanted to say that I am blown away by all that you have had to deal with. I mean, what a huge revelation to find out the giant impact that your boyhood illness had on you mentally and physically, and it had been totally not addressed at the time! I just think it must be so difficult to deal with all of this on your own, at least you are sharing it here with us, but I really think if possible you should try going to a therapist who you can talk about this with, and also about your dysfunctional family dynamics (which I also had) and the trauma you had to deal with in school. I just think it is a lot to process on your own.
Cammy you really need to give yourself credit, you said you felt suicidal from a young age, but you know what, you are a survivor!!! That kid went through so much and survived so much without help, in my eyes he is a hero.
There are times I wish I never had kids. Its not that I dont "love" them, but I am finding it increasingly difficult to be their "Dad". I can not handle the stress. Things for me were so incredibly different, I cant support them financially, I cant stand it when they "argue". Until this past summer I thought my teen years were "normal" but I find out now that they were not even close to "normal". I hate what I have become. I have problems sorting my past out, wish I could forget the "hell" , thinking about suicide just 8 months after being sick never understood where those feelings came from. why me??? what did I do to derserve this HELL???
As other members have suggested, the teenage years are often a time when adolescents test the boundaries of those around them. This can include teachers, co-workers, their friends, and especially their parents. We all know that our family will be there for us so it becomes easiest for teenagers to defy their parents' rules because they know their parents will always be there for them.
As Faryal suggested, have you spoken to your son about his reasons for his dishonesty? By speaking to him in an open manner he may also be able to give you insight into his motives for doing what he did. Perhaps he was experiencing a conflict at work which he was unsure how to deal with? Maybe there was something else going on for him and this was his way of coping?
Keep us posted on how he responds. Stay strong cammy.
As a teen I was always trying to do the "right" thing and it never occured to me to do otherwise - besides I had enough other problems on my hand and I did not need to add anymore. It was also easier to go along with things than to "fight" and do things "my" way. I guess part of that, being tired at the end of the day, I simply went down to my room and did my school work, and "disappeared" for the evening. Why my son does all this and "fights" with us I don't know.
