Strength, I can relate to most of what you are saying. In my recent crash and burn episode that I'm still crawling out of the charred mess - I had my bouts of private emotional outbursts (translates to uncontrollable crying seemingly over nothing). Well, I got out my journal and I started writing after I finally quit crying and I remembered things that flashed through my mind as I cried. I don't think I'd realized that I really did have things going on that I was crying about - I always thought it was just over nothing- just feeling bad - not being able to put a finger on anything. But when these things popped into my head, I could then put an emotion to them.
i.e. picturing mom and dad in their caskets (obviously feeling grief) need to work on that.
my son - some role transition there, due to parents recent deaths, he's assumed some responsibilities that a parent my age shouldn't need and he's got a new family and has to deal with depression issues wth me (guilt, embarassed, ashamed) need to work on that too.
I came up with a major list - I couldn't believe how long it was. I'm taking it to my therapist on Thursday. I mean I got rid of alot of negative core beliefs when I worked through the sessions the first time. I'm going again, because I think new issues arise, new negative beliefs surface, new issues occur which create negative beliefs.
One more thing - I've been following along on Samantha, moderators, post re: Role transition and The stress response and role transition.
I think everyone should take a really good look at these and give them some thought. I read the one dated 11/9/ after I got through my last uncontrollable crying spell and I'm like "ah ha". I went back and red the other one, and another "ah haaaa".
so ah haaaa ah haaaa ah haaaa and I hope you all have many.