I had my first day of therapy today. I loved the therapist. We talked about a lot of my background, what triggered my depression, etc.
She asked me a lot of questions that were about when it started this time. I had lots to say (started feeling the downhill around October). We narrowed it down to a number of factors: Job burnout, over work, lack of self care, lack of pleasurable activities, exhaustion. She was wonderful and funny. At one point, she said, so your UU's aren't big enough to feed the world?! That's made me laugh so hard that I thought I would pee.
There was a connection. I saved the last piece that I wanted to talk about for last. I met my current boyfriend in August. And he's worked really hard to be with me. I have been single since 1993, and happily so. I have run domestic violence classes for men for 13 years in our county, and they don't stop coming. Hundreds and hundreds of men. I know every single excuse in the book for why they hurt someone they loved, and they just don't stop coming. I've actually wondered at times if there are any men left in our county that I haven't treated.
Consequently, I have looked at anyone I date very hard for any signs of verbal, physical, or mental abuse. Most of the time, I have one date because I hear something that sends up a red flag.
Okay. So this guy is different. I've been seeing him for 8 months, tried everything in my power to push him away, and he sticks. He has stayed with me through this depression, and loves me unconditionally even if he doesn't quite understand.
Have to continue this in a minute cause my little guy is calling for me.