Step 1: Write down the positive and negative aspects of the relationship. What did you like or enjoy most about that person? What about your relationship do you miss the most? How do you feel when you think about the positive aspects of your relationship? What did you like least about the person?
Please note: This can be very difficult to do as we don’t like to think about negative aspects of our relationships when we’re grieving. However, there’s usually at least something that we didn’t like about the relationship.
Step 2: Consider your most recent relationship with the person. Was it always like that?
Step 3: Overall, what was your relationship like? Was it more positive than negative or more negative than positive?
Step 4: Is there any way to make any positive meaning out of your loss?
Step 5: Is there any ritual that could help you cope with your loss (it could be very public and formal, or very personal and private).
Step 6: Is there anything else that you can do to cope better with your loss? What can you do to get the social support you need? What can you do to develop new relationships, interests and hobbies?