Hey FF... since you have started a separate thread on this, I will go ahead and repost my tale of meds and depression just to keep it all in the same place. I hope other ppl will offer their experience too. (I did edit some)
As for the medications, all I can offer is what my experience has
been. Upping or lowering meds causes all kinds of emotional and
physical changes... best undertaken with a doctor's supervision. I
can't tell you how many times I decided to go off my meds.... for many
different reasons.... feeling better, feeling worse, cost, side effects,
didn't want to be a "crazy". About a month into my quit I would be
wondering why my moods were so up or down or I was so irritable and had a hard time focusing.
Since the effects did not wear off immediately, by the time they did,
I'd forgotten I'd ever felt better and that it was while I was taking my medications!
I don't go off my meds anymore and I've learned to check with my
doctor (used to have a pdoc but now just see my gp) before making any
changes. Life works better for me when I do. It was hard to come to
the realization that I need to stay on them probably for the rest of my
life... I am hoping doing the CBT will maybe mean I can eventually take a
lower dosage. This messed up brain chemistry stuff is no myth... it
can be really, truly debilitating.
You said that you felt like those negative thoughts were with you on the drug, just not as constant. For me, the negative thoughts and depressed moods are still present when I'm on meds but they aren't as constant, deep or debilitating... they become manageable and I'm more likely to recognize the signs of depression and... well, get back to managing and things get better pretty quickly.
Do you have a doctor you can consult about your meds?
Why did you decide to wean yourself off the Effexor?
Have you ever tried any other medications?
