No, I have never heard of Attachment Theory, but I do know my parents held a view of child-rearing that would allow a baby to "cry it out" rather than spoil it. I will try and find more info about this theory.
I'm new to this program but have read your posts today and wanted to respond to you.
Are you familiar with Attachment Theory? If not, you should look into it. If you are, you know that it has to do with the attachments we form as infants. From your descriptions of your behavior as an infant, it sounds possible that you could have experienced some "attachment issues" that your mother doesn't remember or doesn't consider significant. For example, if you were left in the nursery at the hospital to cry for long periods... It might sound crazy, but these experiences can lead to a lack of faith in humanity. If you cry and cry and no one comes to you, you realize that you can't depend on humans to meet your needs...
It might be a topic you could look into and contemplate on for a little while.
I have another bout of depression. It seemed to be triggered by nothing (except being 10 days before my period as often my bouts are). So I have been studying my old Thought Records and analysing them for meaning and insight into my Core Beliefs and see a trend that seems to show that I don't like humanity, including myself. So I look back into my childhood to find what could have made me hate the world and I see that I have been uncomfortable with humans since birth. My mother claims that if she held me as a baby I would arch my back and go stiff. I remember when I was about 3-4 years old waiting for kids to vacate the sandbox so I could play there. I would not play in it if someone else was there. I didn't like other people. I remember being in school and not liking my classmates. I remember spending recess hidden at the limits of the playground so I could sing without being judged by others. I remember the school suggesting that I skip a grade three and four because I was way too advanced for the class and getting excited about meeting new kids in case I might actually like one of them (but I was not allowed to skip any grades as my parents were worried since I was already withdrawn that I would not be able to socialize with the older kids). So it looks like there is no "event" that made me hate the world. I seem to have been born that way. Why would a child be born so negative and with so much hatred for humanity? And if I was born this way, what hope do I have of changing? Surely it is my hatred for humanity causing my depression? I have "challenged" these negative thoughts and find them to be true...humans are like a cancer to the planet, they are destroying it. They are destructive. They make mistakes. Humans are self-preserving. Humans always want....want MORE. And I am human.....
