Hi momstheword
I won't presume to advise you - it sounds to me as if you've maybe been trying to absorb too much advice already. I can, thouhg, recount my experiences as a parent. We have three boys, now aged 20, 18 and 15. They are intelligent, thoughtful, polite young men of whom I am very proud. They can think for themselves, which for me is the most important goal of parenting and education.
And, you know what? As they have grown up, they have all three enjoyed tv and video games, and have seen myself and my partner do the same. They have witnessed us in bad moods, lazy moods, stressed and angry at times. They have witnessed my depression wax and wane over and over.
The perfect parent does not exist, and it is fruitless to try and be that. Children have to learn that people are not perfect all the time : sometimes we are unreasonable, sometimes we are impatient, sometimes we don't listen. But we love them and we have a home full of love. Everyday, strong, love. Not sentimental or sloppy, rarely overtly expressed, but it is there, it is the environment. That is the most valuable gift we can give our children. It's not all been plain sailing, of course. We have not raised saints, but rounded people.
So - I won't say to ignore expert advice, but be wary. There are always experts to espouse any view or opinion. Every child, every parent, every family, is different. This is your baby, you are his mother, you do know best. Be yourself. Be mellow when you feel mellow, be grumpy when you feel grumpy, but always love and give your baby freedom to grow, in his own way, into a beautiful individual.
Sorry, I have ended up sounding like I'm telling you what to do as well. I'm not really shouting at you here, momstheword, just sharing my experiences. I'm screwed-up in a lot of ways, there's a lot in my life I could have done better, but my children are the crowning glory of my existence, and I wanted to help you see what a marvellous gift you have here, and how your own instincts are the best guide.
Your instincts may tell you to ignore this old windbag, which would be fair too.