I am so sorry for all you had to go through. It sounds like an extremely difficult situation. This is not your fault; the situation or the depression. You should never feel like you should hide your emotions from the person you are in a romantic relationship with. You also cannot just "get over it". Many people do not understand depression but that does not mean it is acceptable for either your ex boyfriend or your friends to treat you the way they have. In my opinion I think you are better off finding friends and a romantic partner who help you when times are tough and are willing to listen to your emotions. What are friends for after all?
That all being said, good for you for coming here and trying to take control of this. You can learn to challenge your depression and start to feel good again. Make a schedule for when you want to work on the program and stick with it. Reward yourself for completing sessions and working on goals. Post here often; we are behind you 100% and will be right there with you every step of the way. Put the work into this and you will see results.
You can take control of this and make new relationships. This sounds to me like it is a pivotal learning and growing time of your life. Times like these are hard but they are also what shape people to be strong, compassionate and resilient. What do you want to learn in during this difficult time? How does it feel to be making the choice to move forward?
Hi calibun... welcome to the DC forums. I like your honesty and clarity about what you are dealing with. You have definitely found a safe place where you can learn how to overcome the big D. Plenty of support here from people who do know what it is like trying to live "normal" lives while dragged at by the depression. If you haven't done so yet... do browse through previous discussion topics. There are many threads about telling v. not telling. Something we all struggle with it seems. Anyway... I'm glad you found us and hope you will continue to check in regularly.
a 23 year old student/ I work full time. About 5 months ago my boyfriend of 2 years broke up with me because he never thought I was going to get better. It took that break up to realize I had been suffering from either mild depression or full on MDD for a while. Although he promised to help me through it he quickly moved onto another relationship. I would be able to accept that but the failure of the relationship has made my insecurities grow obviously (he believe I would get better). He became close friends with my friends while we were dating and for the past 5 months my friends have told me to get over it and just be okay with everything. This is something I can not do. I have learned or realized he is my trigger for my worst episodes of depression, it is not healthy to be around him. Therefore I have lost my social life and my friends.
A little more about why this situation is so hard for me to over come is because i moved to this city 6 years ago right after with my parents. I do not come from a very stable or close family therefore i have relied friends to be my support group. Being so far away from my friends and essentially losing them made me very insecure i suppose. Now that I feel as if losing my new group of friends to my ex and his new gf has been devastating. The situation has made my emotions worse. I have told my friends about the severity of my depression (acting out in various ways) but none have made an effort to help me through this dark hole. I'm constantly told to get over it.
I have come to this group to "get over it". I'm on medication, I'm looking to move downtown to be closer to my new job and hopefully new friends. I like reading everyone else's stories to feel like I'm not alone. That its normal to not be perfect all the time, that everyone has their faults but thats what makes people love them. I have a tendency to beat my self up over the littlest things (partly because my ex always made me feel horrible about having feelings). I have come here to let my true feelings out and ask for help from people who know what its like. Just remember my depression isn't all about my relationship ending its about my insecurities as a person and trying to overcome those feelings of unworthiness!
