I did have an appointment to see my doctor a few months ago but didn't make it. We discussed a few things about hormones. I really need to go back again and see my options. Procrastination! I am also seeing a psychiatrist for other medication, I will see him next month to talk about the medication, I might need something different. I keep telling myself that I can talk my way out of it, but it isn't working and I have to keep pulling myself back up again, so I will try to make
The negative can also be exacerbated by hormonal and chemical imbalances. We can't advise on medications but we are allowed to share our own experience. I've been on a mix of medications for some time and do find it helpful to smooth out the highs and lows. Have you talked to your doctor about how you are feeling?
That is a lot of good advice. One of the questions, why would letting go of the fears lead to more depression, I guess because the depression comes just when I am at my happiest. I have to learn that when I am happy, to have some middle ground, right now, I have just been on a roller coaster and I need to just take it step by step.
I will try to keep posting as writing does help. I will also try to answer some more of the questions in your post.
I like the experiment you did today, focusing on positive things that have happened this week. That is a great way to begin challenging your negative thoughts. I encourage you to continue this through the week.
Write down your negative thoughts and turn them into positives.
Why do you think that letting go of your fears will only lead to further depression?
How would you answer each question that you posed to yourself?
If you were to look in the mirror and smile, what do you see? How do you feel inside?
Please post often to let us know how you're doing!
Today I noticed that most of the day I spent thinking about negative things that happened and the impressions that I might have left on people. I focused on what happened last week, and I was mind reading what others were thinking about me and how my depression "look" was affecting others.
Today I tried a little experiment and tried to think of some positive things. I managed to think of a few, like taking a walk, having a very short conversation with someone, going to the beach. Even though I carried negative thoughts with me and felt sad, I still did some activities.
Sometimes the alarming thoughts are so overwhelming that I don't know how to get rid of them or to accept them. I am stuck in holding on to them for some kind of safety belt. If I let go of them, I fear that I will spiral even faster. How do I accept that I am not the same person I was when I wasn't depressed? How do I face others, will they still accept me? Will I push them away even further because I know that I won't be good company? If only I could break the boundary around me with a big scream and let it all go. Will I be able to face others again and not feel ashamed or guilty for once being smiley and friendly to being insecure and quiet? I want to smile freely again.