Hi, I'm new to this site and hope this will help me cope better as I am completely alone and have nowhere or no one to talk to that could remotely understand what I'm going through. So I went on a search and found you. I recently was diagnosed with Bipolar II and am going through a guinea pig stage (trial and error of medications and treatments) which I'm sure most of you are familiar with.
I have been treated for depression for the past 8 yrs and am on a good dose of Effexor but this medication has been making my episodes higher and lower and very rapid for quite a few months now. I’m still on this medication but am now also on Seroquel I’m guessing to counteract the effect of the antidepressant. Eventually I am supposed to wean off Effexor but we’re just not there yet. Anyone else gone through a wrong diagnosis before and struggled with the rapid cycling? I feel like I’m going nuts and my family, social, and work life is seriously taking a spiral in that deep dark drain….
I’m finding it hard to understand why I feel the way I do and my husband definitely does not understand why I feel the way I do either. As for work, I’ve been on and off and feel like I can’t function, I can’t seem to concentrate enough to make sense of anything in my head. I work in finance, which is definitely making things more complicated. Work says they understand and are being patient with me but the stress of not being able to perform like I used to is really getting to me.
The kids don’t know a whole lot… they just know that mommy is sick at times. My husband thinks I should be able to just snap out of it. He’s read a lot on the subject but doesn’t understand still. He doesn’t understand why everything I feel would be so strong and why I can’t just cope with it, like everyone does. This has caused for some distance between us as I don’t feel like I can talk to him about how I’m feeling anymore.
I see a psychiatrist this upcoming Saturday for a full out assessment and am scared. I feel like I’m all over the map and don’t know how I’m going to manage explaining it all to that doctor…. Ugh… I’m just so exhausted all the time and I try so hard to make myself look like I’m doing ok to the world around me. Which is making me feel so isolated…
Well that’s all for now I guess… just wondering if anyone can relate… maybe give me advice… I don’t know…
