Hey Marie,
I'm right there with ya. I'm not sure I crave cigarettes as much as my mindset hasn't been as positive lately. I'm tired of replacing cigs with food, and I want my reward. Yes...I'm realizing just what Butterfly said... we always rewarded ourselves with cigs. Yesterday I wondered if non-smokers (as in never smoked) rewarded themselves after mowing, or whatever like we have done. If so, what was their reward?
Our entire day involved cig rewards, although some of mine were just to feed the addiction, but others were like: "Oh good... I'll go smoke now." That's the part I'm having trouble with. I want to have that little reward I used to have. How do you learn to think without the rewards? It just seems like lately, I've had a lot more of those thoughts running around in my head like renegades. And, I smoke every night IN MY DREAMS. It's always teh same thing... I quit smoking, but I smoke about 3 or 4 a week, but still say I've quit smoking - that's my dream.
In the beginning I would dream about smoking, but I never smoked. Somewhere along the way, probably around 60 days, I started smoking in my dreams.
I'm having the same triggers/hurdles you are, so hang in there. I'm going out of town this week, and I love not having the addiction when I travel. No more going several hours without a cig or looking for a smoking room in the airport. I'm going to make a list of all the good things and then a list of the "rewards" we've mentioned, and I know the good list will be much longer than the reward list. I think that may help put it into a different perspective for me.
Good luck to you...
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 12/31/2006
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 90
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,356
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $173.7
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 10 [B]Hrs:[/B] 12 [B]Mins:[/B] 1 [B]Seconds:[/B] 43