I finally forced myself to stay home. Two nights in a row now! It was hard but I kept tell myself the following:
- I haven't died during the night yet and I always wake up
- I can do this
- I need to be a mother right now
- The phone is right here if I need help
I didn't panic either night. I had high anxiety and didn't sleep too well, but I didn't panic.
Ask yourself the following:
Have you ever NOT picked up your son?
Have you ever passed out, gone crazy, or died yet?
My guess is your answer is "no" to both of these. It's that "what if" thinking. Start challenging that and saying "I WILL pick my son up", "I will be okay", "I CAN do this".
Hope this helps some.
I fear that too Sherri Ann. I fear what will happen if I need help. Right now on the new meds I fear what if I fall asleep and can't go get my youngest son from bus stop.
Plus I just feel this need for company right now. Hate being alone
I am glad you have such a good friend. It is really hard for others to understand our needs and our fear of being alone. I'm just afraid I'm going to die or need assistance and noone will be there to help.
Sherri Ann
The last major relapse I had. I thankfully had a very understanding friend. Who had just learned she was pregnant. I'd call her at 5:30am (the time hubby left for work) to come over I NEEDED HER. She'd come over with her 3 yo than and help me get my older two ready for school. Than she'd take care of my 3 yo than and let me sleep or what not.
I feel very much like a child at times too. I have no blood family around here. So we rely alot on a close family friends. Same ones above. I call her and tallk to her on phone ask her over here, mall walk, go to her house. whatever just to make it through the days.
I do the same thing. I drag my kids to my mothers house 30 miles away each night and often beg my husband to come home for work or not go into work when I can't go to my mom's. I'm 33 years old and feel like I'm four.
