Last night was a hard night of waking up off and on all night..At 2:40 or 4:40 am I was awakened with the thought, Whats the point going through my head..I wonder if this is my own thought or not...Its kind of like the thought, if I let myself relax and be happy,,than something bad will happen. These negative core beliefs and assumptions are hard to fight off at times..I think I might even be developing some new ones..Or maybe they were always there and are just coming to the surface now...
I find myself really tired and depressed this morning and unmotivated to do anything....I think I will take a couple of Valium or xanax and go back to bed....I hope tomarrow will be a better day....
Not to change the subject but I am finding that when I find myself getting off track the best thing for me to do is to step back and take a little breather for a while and engage myself in a pleasant activity of some kind...This gives my mind a much needed rest. It may take day or a week or what ever but when I come back later I find that I am refreshed and better able to work the program. I can think more clearly and get back on track again...
Interesting question Vincenza... helpful too because I had not noted the change in feelings... duh. I started out feeling frustrated and very negative and by the end.... total turn around... I felt hopeful again. No, I don't have all the answers but just thinking about the questions sure helps bring focus and awareness of the progress I have made. So often I hesitate to post because my initial response is so negative.... but maybe I should do more of just answering without judging and let the process happen. It's just too easy to say "Oh, I'm just so negative... I can't post anything." And, stop there... not even try to think it through because ... what's the point? Hard to remember when I'm brooding within myself... sigh... gotta remember it ALWAYS helps to reach out and get other perspectives.
I like your approach to thinking through the comments
and questions Ashley recently posted. Even though you may not know what
your 'larger goal' is at the time being, you are taking all the right
steps in figuring it out. The fact that you can look back and see the
benefits of your hard work in challenging your negative thoughts, as
difficult as is to do, is a truly admirable achievement.
Even though these negative thoughts may resurface occasionally, it sounds like you know how to confront them.
How did you feel after writing your post yesterday?
I do feel unmotivated because it hurts and it's hard and those thoughts are hard to change and whine, whine, whine... OK, I'll try a little more positive... I want to do this work because it will remove the emotional thorn that holds my soul down in the darkness. Eww... not very uplifting. How do I turn that motivation into a positive one?
What are some other ways to motivate yourself?
I have no idea.
What has challenging your thoughts already brought to your life?
Now this I can answer in a positive way because truly.... challenging my thoughts, as I've learned to do working this program, has made all the difference in my life. It has taken away so much fear... to just face this stuff down and question it... question everything... it takes all the power away from the fear...
What can challenging your thoughts bring to your life?
FREEDOM !
Sorry for the long winded post but you get me going on how to get motivated and it's hard to stop me...I guess it's a Life Coach thing
Challenging core belief is hard. Also, change is hard and add facing painful things to the mix makes it that much harder! It is normal to feel overwhelmed when trying to change the way you think.
This is a good reminder... you would think I'd remember this by now. Reassurance helps calm the frustration!
The program is great because it helps you to break down this larger goal (changing how you think) into smaller, more manageable steps. This in itself is motivating.
Another excellent reminder... I need to try to figure out what my goal is and ask for help breaking it down. I'm just not sure what my goal is.
But there are other ways to feel more motivated as well. One big one thing that we talk about a lot here but I feel many members overlook is rewarding yourself. Each and every step you take towards challenging a negative core belief is something to be proud of. Really acknowledge this! I have seen many of you come leaps and bounds since when you first came. Do you know how amazing this is? Celebrate it . Do what you need to do to be present to each goal you achieve and how far you have already come. Set up rewards plan with big rewards for the bigger goals. How can you celebrate?
Totally corny but... being reminded of the progress made is quite the reward... "amazing"?!
Another way o increase motivation is to focus on the positives of challenging thoughts and not how hard it is. Whenever you catch yourself thinking "this is hard" stop and refocus. Sid (red), you have already mentioned many reasons why challenging your negative thoughts is so important. This is a great step. Write down your reasons why it is important and try to think of even more reasons. Try to think of the feelings that goes along with these reasons too. One great way to get more reasons is to pick one reason and then ask yourself, "What does this give me that I don't already have?" You can ask yourself this question 100 times and go deeper and deeper. Once you have your list, keep it handy and pull it out when you are feeling unmotivated.
Challenging core belief is hard. Also, change is hard and add facing painful things to the mix makes it that much harder! It is normal to feel overwhelmed when trying to change the way you think. The program is great because it helps you to break down this larger goal (changing how you think) into smaller, more manageable steps. This in itself is motivating. But there are other ways to feel more motivated as well. One big one thing that we talk about a lot here but I feel many members overlook is rewarding yourself. Each and every step you take towards challenging a negative core belief is something to be proud of. Really acknowledge this! I have seen many of you come leaps and bounds since when you first came. Do you know how amazing this is? Celebrate it . Do what you need to do to be present to each goal you achieve and how far you have already come. Set up rewards plan with big rewards for the bigger goals. How can you celebrate?
Another way o increase motivation is to focus on the positives of challenging thoughts and not how hard it is. Whenever you catch yourself thinking "this is hard" stop and refocus. Sid (red), you have already mentioned many reasons why challenging your negative thoughts is so important. This is a great step. Write down your reasons why it is important and try to think of even more reasons. Try to think of the feelings that goes along with these reasons too. One great way to get more reasons is to pick one reason and then ask yourself, "What does this give me that I don't already have?" You can ask yourself this question 100 times and go deeper and deeper. Once you have your list, keep it handy and pull it out when you are feeling unmotivated.
What are some other ways you can motivate yourself?
What has challenging your thoughts already brought to your life?
What can challenging your thoughts bring to your life?
Sorry for the long winded post but you get me going on how to get motivated and it's hard to stop me...I guess it's a Life Coach thing
