YapJoy ... Have you checked with your doctor about other causes for your fatigue? I was exhausted for ages too, then found out I have fibromyalgia. I've been to a whole bouquet of specialists and the bottom line is "live with it", but being a "type A" personality, that hasn't been very helpful advice. Instead I just learned to worry at warp speed about not getting things done.
These days a lot of my depression is caused by being disabled. I can't work anymore, can't do any of the things I once lived for. I'm learning to deal with it ... slow learner, though, since I've been on disability for nearly 4 years now. ;)
CBT will help, if I can ever find the energy to actually do the sessions.
I have always used sleep as an escape from my depression, but this fatigue is different. I literally cannot drag myself out of bed some days because the exhaustion and pain are too much. I'd certainly get it checked out ... if nothing else, putting a name to it helps and so does getting the correct medications.
Nice to have ya here anyway. :)
Confused offers good advice ... making a start toward something positive can go a long way toward restoring hope. And now you have all of us, Miakoda ... We may all be on leave from the acorn academy, but at least we understand one another. :)
For me, there are times when I just have to [b]make[/b] myself do something. It's almost impossible when I'm not on my meds, so I get that, but if you can force yourself to post here, start the sessions, perhaps join in the chat if anyone is around, you may feel less hopeless and alone.
Another thing that helps me is humour. When I'm really a mess, I go to some of the sites I have bookmarked that make me laugh. It never fails to help. Sounds silly and simple, but it does work for me. I'm always searching out new online places to drag a smile out of me ... and since I don't mind the raunchy stuff, there are tons. Might be worth a try?
I'd love to be able to visit with all of you on the chat provided here. Trouble is, almost no one seems to use it and we are rarely online at the same time.
Is anyone interested in setting a time and meeting up in the chat room? The more the merrier! I'm not working so can be available pretty much anytime I'm not sleeping. :)
Any thoughts anyone?
Although I can't comment on the relationship stuff (I'm in my first true love relationship now in my 40s ... although not for lack of interviewing candidates!), I can speak to the alcohol thing.
Like a lot of folks here, I grew up in a rotten home. Alcohol was available for the snitching at any time and I learned early that it provided me with a wonderful escape from feeling miserable.
Unfortunately alcohol is a depressant plus it lowers common sense. Add those together with a dose of clinical depression and you have a recipe for the bleakest, darkest depression imaginable.
I finally sobered up when I was 27. I haven't had a drink in over 20 years. I found that AA worked for me, I went to tons of meeting the first decade of my recovery, worked the program, spent time with people who had a solid grip on their sobriety, got a sponsor immediately. In other words, I finally did something I was told to do. :) Not my best thing, but it worked.
Getting rid of the booze did change the depression dramatically. At least the suicidal part of it ... I still had work to do, but gradually I discovered that the thoughts of checking out went away. I haven't had a suicidal thought in almost 10 years.
Getting sober is not easy, but it's simple ... put the plug in the jug, do whatever you have to do to keep it there. Period. Join AA, take antibuse from your doctor, get therapy, do whatever you have to to stay sober.
Nothing comes before my sobriety, not my partner (whom I would die for), not my work, nothing. It is at the very top of my "to do" list in life. If I drink, I lose everything else so it has to be my priority. And I would do absolutely [b]anything[/b] to not return to that pit of dispair I experienced when I was drinking. I never want to feel that bad again and will do whatever I have to in order to not go there.
It's been my experience that folks who suffer depression frequently use alcohol. Seems like a lot of us found some solace there in the beginning then spent years chasing that same feeling ... to no avail. The solution became the problem.
If you are depressed, you simply cannot drink and expect to get past the depression. I have never seen an exception to that and I've been around juice heads and depressed people for a long time. The two are a lethal combo.
I know I'm not the only sober one here at the Depression Center. If anyone needs to talk about that issue, I'm happy to swap stories or to just listen. Start a thread about it and I bet you'll get a lot of good, solid words of wisdom from people here who have been through it.
Someone told me early in my sobriety that you cannot will away alcoholism any more than you can will away diarrhea. You have to fess up if it's a problem and do the mental medicine required. Or not. ~shrug~ I'm not a preacher about it, but I know from experience that booze turns the blues into blacks.
Miakoda ... good for you! Now you can share all the details so us folks who have no life can live vicariously through you. ;) Getting out and about is a bold and courageous step. Obviously you are one of those people determined not to wallow in the misery. That's a huge advantage!! I have a whole lot of respect for people who do that.
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Today I spent some time reading posts here and it led me to my positive thought for today ... people who work hard at feeling better.
Hearing the sad stories, hearing the problems, hearing the misery ... it all helps me identify with the people at this board. It makes me realize I'm not alone.
Hearing that people are moving ahead despite these issues is amazingly uplifting for me. To see folks who continue on in the face of adversity, who hold onto hope despite the difficulty in doing so, who refuse to be conquered by their depression all inspire me.
Just by going on with life, the people here provide a positive place for me to come. So here's to all the folks who share here and who keep on keepin' on no matter how tough it gets. Thanks!!
RCGuy ... Congrats on your 10 days. Even after a couple decades, I still do it one day at a time. I can't begin to imagine spending the rest of my life doing [i]anything[/i], nevermind something difficult, but I can manage it for 24 hours. I can pretty much handle anything if I take it in bits. :)
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I'm glad you are finding some good stuff here. I haven't been around that long myself, but I've found this place to be a real treasure.
G'morning all!
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It's Sunday, I have very few errands to run today, and I am determined to do some work on my sessions. My happy thought for today is I truly believe life is what you make it and I'm feeling determined to make mine as good as I can. It's been a while since I've felt that kind of motivation. Makes for a happy morning!
Awww, thanks Confused. It's so good to hear that my sharing is of value to others.
It seems to me that people like you ... people who are obviously willing to do what they need to do ... are the ones who get the furthest in life. That's an inspiration to me. I have mastered a few things along the way, but struggle like crazy with other things. I always try to maintain that attitude of willingness that you expressed in your post. Seeing others do so well at it gives me strength.
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Welcome Mags.
Daily Llama's advice is right on the money. Being good to ourselves in ways that don't run up the bills or leave us staring at the TV is a huge first step. Took me years to learn to do that for myself!!
I so understand the lack of motivation. I have fibro and there are times when I simply cannot do the things that need to be done. That results in this total chaos in my life and I feel so overwhelmed I don't even know where to begin to sort things out. I feel paralyzed, sit in front of the TV or computer and just can't seem to begin to get going. Then, of course, I get all pissed off at myself for not taking care of things. Yi. Big, ugly circle.
At least you've arrived here. That's something postive. :)
I know it took years to find exactly the right combo of antidepressants that work for me. I take Prozac and Welbutrin now, and that seems to be the magic bullet. Ok, maybe not magic, but it cuts waaaaay back on the crying, being totally paranoid and miserable.
I also have been through therapy using CBT and find it's the most effective mental medicine I can apply. Getting motivated to do the sessions, well, that's another thing tho, isn't it?
Thankfully I see the mods here have started some threads to encourage us. I noticed them and am looking forward to taking advantage of that gentle little push.
Anyway, welcome!
