Two or three years ago when my father was yelling at me bacause I dindn't quiet fit into the family business. the old thing that their are doing everything for me etc... in the first times I was yelling back with the result that for days we ended like strangers only to yell again... than I changed tactics... I know it sound strange but I adopted with him a dog training tactic (i hope he doesn't read this :D ) - every time he forgot the magic word "please" I was ignoring him totally - you know I was just closing the door.
I know that you are feeling just awful and you should make him understand that you deserve some respect. Every human beeing deserves respect.
You are a great person and first of all you are human. You are not just a walking and speaking thing. You feel, you cry you want someone to be with you, you care for others. And believe me nowadays is really a rare thing to see a human. So I don't really know who is worthed or not.
yeah the same problem with locking the door.... then I started thinking that was an automatic thing and that I should trust myself on this. Now I'm just trying to concentrate on the action itself so I'm sure that I locked the door. It seems to be working.
When I was taking my meds it happened to me too. I didn't know why I was so edgy and angry and so on.... Then I found a way not to forget them anymore. I kept them near the tooth brush. So it was impossible not to spot them in the morning.
If you don't feel like rafting is ok just don't do it. You don't need to prove anything to anybody. Just enjoy the mountains and the beauty of sun. It has something special in the mountains. And enjoy all sounds and smells. Try to understand what sound is made by who? The same for smells. Look around, discover the small animals that are hidden from people eyes.
After a month of travel and so called holidays i'm again here and in need to help myself. I need to understand witch way to go and to find enough mental energy to follow my dreams and to take my chances. Yesterday I've just had another really bad discussion with my parents and once again it is clear that they simply can't understand me. And is not my depression getting me to think like that.... I'm different, I would like to be free to make my own mistakes and not t hear again and again that they have health problems because of me and that they work for me and s.o.
