This is a great question. I am sure many members can relate to feeling uneasy when discussing certain topics. Check out the section in the program on relaxation techniques. This may help you stay calm. Also, tracking your thoughts may help. What thoughts are triggering this anxiety and how can you reframe this thinking?
hello friends. first of all i should thank you all giving me more than wat i expected. thanks.
i need your suggestion regarding my problem. in any sensitive talks or little agressive talks or depressed talks , whether its with friends or family , i feel uneasyness and short of breath. even looking such scene in movies. could u help me out how to overcum this problem.
i guess my panic attack actually starts with the problem of short breathness.
People often like to talk and enjoy a good listener. If you are nervous then open with something they will talk about and you can listen and answer with one or two word answers till you feel comfortable talking more. And you will. You will calm down and soon find yourself part of the conversation. Avoid talking to some one who is just looking for someone to agree with every thing they say. You will end up feeling trapped.
I agree with Sunny, a big part of having a conversation is just listening and asking questions. Definitely try to ask questions and take time to listen to the answer that is given. This will give you the chance to collect your thoughts. Give it a try next time you find yourself in this situation and let us know what happens!
Members, do you have any other helpful tips for Jaii?
Hello Jaii: One trick I have when I start to feel nervous speaking with someone is this - I ask them questions about themselves and this gives me a chance to relax and take a breath. I try to remember that a conversation is a two-way street, each of us gets a turn to say something. When you ask someone something about themselves, it shows you are interested and caring. It doesn't have to be anything really serious and deep, remember, you are just meeting them and so want to keep it light. Another thing I learned was to read/hear the news before going to an event. That way you are up-to-date on current issues and can add something to the conversation if you can't think of anything to say. A good sense of humour is great - tell a joke.
As for depressing and sensitive issues, I think (my opinion only) better wait until you know that person better especially if it is in a social setting with lots of people around. Or if the subject is brought up, talk in general terms only.
If you mean only thinking about it all the time and hard to stop thinking about it - try relaxation techniques and meditation, when the negative thought enters your head, gently push it away each time it comes back and replace the thought with a positive one. It will take some practice.
I hope the above suggestions will give you some ideas. Keep posting
first of all thanks sunny123 i am writing things i am great ful for and the list is increasing to almost 18 no.
i am trying to talk with strangers but though i get nervous little bit and main issue is i feel like short of breath. iguess (it might happen because to impress the other person i might be over talkative)the conclusion i get through the challenge work sheet. though i dont avoid the conversation or try to escape. could you all help me out how to handle such situation? same problem some times happens while thinks about any depressive or sensitive though or situation?
Hi Jaii: Have you tried writing down every day, three things you are grateful for? It helps to see the good things in your life. Instead of dwelling on the negatives, you begin to see the positives in your life. Every day, write down what you are grateful for, could be more than three. Could be simple, such as, the sun is shining today.
As for trusting strangers, I think this is natural not to trust someone we don't know. If it's business, it's easier because it is an exchange of information, not personal. If there is someone you would like to be friends with, it takes a few meetings to be comfortable and begin to open oneself to them. The trust begins when you start to share things together in a friendly way. It takes time to become a friend.
It may take some time to change your negative thinking thought patterns (I am ill) to positive ones. Practice CBT everyday. The relaxation techniques, breathing, are great before worriesome coming events.
I hope these suggestions are useful for you. Keep posting, we support you.
