Bailey52
I know I didn't deserve the abuse I was put through. Parents have a way of making a child believe at the time that it was all your fault and then they try to teach you to accept responsibility for your actions when in fact they don't even do that. I don't believe writing my story will be very beneficial as I no longer see a psychologist (don't know why she just said we were done). I was writing it so the psychologist would understand more about me on a personal level, because the 40 minute sessions that I had essentially nothing got done, it seemed more like what do you think is wrong, why are you sad, this is what you will do to get over it and constantly watching the clock. It was easy to talk to her but I don't believe the counselling helped me (my outlook has changed (I don't cry every day, I don't think about the big bad S word on a daily basis and I am able to smile occassionally) because of medication and not counselling, all my issues are still there just easier to deal with the medication).
I lived my life, I know what happened, I do not want to rehash the crap for myself (doesn't make sense to repeat it), I will only do it for someone else, because it isn't important to rehash for me, I would rather escape reality and play my Mario or read a smut novel than go over stuff that is long dead.
I agree there should be more help for people who have been abused, but what when the abuse is happening, no-one says anything, children don't speak up for themselves, when they are adults, they are already pretty screwed up and the world views people with mood disorders as "not really sick" and requiring help. When Adults finally ask for help, it tends to be whatever the insurance plan (if they have one) dictates they will get and not necessarily what they need for their individual requirements. In my experience I have found that unless something tries the big bad S word they aren't taken seriously by family, friends, healthcare providers etc.
Sorry thinking again.
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